


Sweet Cream Kisses

by idontevenknowugh



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Dirty Talk, Lingerie, M/M, Oral Sex, edgeberry, getting caught, honeymustard - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-02
Updated: 2017-02-02
Packaged: 2018-09-19 00:16:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9408908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idontevenknowugh/pseuds/idontevenknowugh
Summary: Red stood straight, hips cocked and hand on his hip. He was wearing a red satin dressing gown that fell mid femur, with a sheer black robe hanging loose over it. The robe had slipped down the monster’s other arm, exposing the bone there. Stretch grinned, drinking in the sight gratefully.





	

**Author's Note:**

> My contribution for the Writers’ Harem challenge. The prompt was: A Papyrus as a milkman, a Sans as a housewife.
> 
> Kinda took liberties with housewife, but I think it works. Haha. Also, I have kinda developed a thing for really blatant, bare everything sex talk. Idk why. >_>

“Milk delivery- shit!” Stretch just about dropped the delivery box as the back door of the Fell residence slammed open, smashing into the brick siding. Phalanges wrapped around his bow tie, pulling him forward and down into a kiss.

He let the wooden box come to rest on the porch, propping his straightened arms on it, to keep his balance, as he opened his mouth to admit Red’s tongue. The other monster delved in aggressively, like always. Stretch’s tongue responded appropriately, but let Red have his way, content to let hin wear himself out.

When he was finally released, Stretch got a chance to look at the shorter skeleton. Red straightened, hips cocked, with one hand resting on his iliac crest. He was wearing a red satin chemise that fell mid femur, with a sheer black robe hanging loose over it. The robe had slipped down the monster’s other arm, exposing the bone there that extra bit. Stretch grinned, drinking in the sight gratefully.

“Where were you last week?” Red demanded, his sharp teeth turned up in a snarl. The gold one glinted in the early morning light.

“Didn't Slim tell you?” Stretch asked, leaning down to open the box. “I was sick.”

“Slim barely said two words to me.” Red retorted, ignoring the milk jars and glaring at Stretch. “He just blushed a bunch and ran off. You better?”

Stretch laughed to himself, wondering if Red had been in this same getup last week. If so, Slim probably enjoyed the view bit _too_ much. Stretch looked up at the other monster.

“Aw, are you worried about me?”

“Of course not, you idiot!” Red looked horrified by the question, but a blush was spreading across his cheek bones. “Get in here.” He turned and stalked into the house. Stretch closed the box and followed, bringing it with him.

Red hopped up on the counter, watching Stretch haul the delivery over to the fridge. The smaller skeleton’s intense, red eyelights distracted Stretch as he put the milk, eggs, and butter away. He could feel the gaze, hot, on his back. Not to mention, every time he glanced up Red had spread his femurs a bit more, until, as Stretch finished up, he was able to see the matching red lace panties the other wore.

With forced casualness, Stretch walked over to Red. “That seems to be all of it. Is there anything else I can do for-”

Red pulled him into another kiss as soon as he as was within reach. Stretch’s body followed, his arms slipping around the smaller skeleton’s lower back to pull their bodies together. He broke the kiss to lick his way down Red’s neck. There was a delightful shiver from the other monster, and he groaned against Stretch’s scapula.

“Shit…Red, you really did miss me, didn’t you?” Stretch chuckled. Red smacked him, but the rebuke behind it was ruined, as his hand landed on Stretch’s ass.

“Shut the fuck up and fuck me, you prick.”

“Mmm, you sure he won’t catch us.” Stretch licked a long stripe along Red’s clavicle.

“What do I care if he does? He’s my brother, not my- ahh!- husband.”

“Could have fooled me.” Nibbles, and a moan from Red. “The way he goes around giving anyone who even _talks_ to you the stink eye.”

“Nnn! He’s just…haaa, he’s just protective.” Red ground his pelvis forward, and Stretch could feel warmth from the other’s arousal through his pants.

“Sure he doesn’t have a thing for you?” Stretch asked, pulling his skull back to look Red in the sockets. Red was flushed, his jaw hanging open slightly and his eyelights hazy. Fuck, he was beautiful. It took a moment for the question to register, making Red perk back up. He burst out laughing, startling Stretch.

“Hell no! Ha, he’s got his sockets on some sweet, gentle, blue-eyed thing down the street. Can’t stop telling me how _perfect_ he is and how _marriageable_ he is.” Stretch fought the urge to comment on how _bitter_ Red sounded.

“Not like I need a husband anyways.” Red groused, crossing his arms and leaning back against the cabinet. He turned his skull away from Stretch, but the taller skeleton could see the other’s red eyelights flick towards him.

“Come on, Red,” Stretch leaned forward to nuzzle at his neck. Red gasped, his hands unfolding to rest on Stretch’s hips. “You have lots of desirable qualities, like…your…”

“If you say ‘pussy’, I’m going to kick you in the junk.”

Stretch laughed, hugging Red tightly. “Like your bluntness. I have never had to guess what you’re thinking. And your sense of humor. Crude, but effective.” He felt Red wiggle against him. “Why, I would-” Stretch stopped, feeling his face heat as he almost let too much slip out.

“You…would…what…?” Shit, shit, shit. Abort! Stretch’s first instinct was to pull away, make excuses, and leave. Red sounded so hesitant. Stretch had never heard the other monster speak like that before, usually all harsh words and snippy tone. The overwhelming desire to reassure Red filled Stretch.

“I- I shouldn’t…,” Stretch said instead, resting his skull on Red’s scapula. “Your brother hates me. He would gut me if he ever knew that we…that I feel….” He sighed. He couldn’t even say it. Well, that was the end of that. He had really liked spending time with Red.

“Fuck Edge!” Red proclaimed, startling Stretch into lifting his skull. He must have looked as scandalized as he felt, because Red suddenly flushed and glared at him.

“Not like that, asshole. I’m not going to let him decide everything about my life.” Red looked nervous. “Besides, if you…if you really…. Well, let’s just say you have a little more in your hand than you know, where my brother is concerned.”

Stretch looked at Red, trying to decipher that statement. In what possible way could he have any power over Edge? Red’s brother was the very definition of stubborn. He didn’t listen to anyone, let alone Stretch. The only monster he knew that could get the grouchy skeleton to change his mind was…

“Did you say…blue-eyed…?”

* * *

“Ohhhh….fuuuuuck…..,” Red moaned above him. Stretch smirked before diving back into the slick red folds of magic. He savored the taste of the other monster on his tongue as he thrust it in and and out. His arms wrapped around Red’s pelvis, pulling it closer to the edge of the counter, which let him delve deeper. Phalanges clutched at his skull, the sharp tips scratching just hard enough to feel nice.

“Hmmm,” he hummed, making Red jerk against him. Stretch could feel the other’s legs cross behind his back, locking him in place. Fine by him. Some light nibbling was equally well received, with lots of very loud cursing and a gush of liquid against his mouth. Stretch licked it up greedily, holding Red still with his arms as he teased the other’s clit periodically.

“Goddamnit, Stretch,” Red groaned, unlocking his legs and pushing gently against his skull. Stretch ignored him, nipping at Red’s clit before thrusting his tongue back in. Red howled, his pelvis jerking forward as he came all over Stretch’s face. The taller skeleton licked and sucked up Red’s release, until he quieted back to moans. Pulling his skull back, Stretch made a pass over his teeth, tasting even more of Red there. He looked up to find a glare waiting for him.

“You planning on staying down there all day?” Red grouched, gasping from his orgasm. “If so, you also better plan on jerking it when you get home. I’m in no mood to suck your dick.”

“You’d really,” Stretch sat back before standing from his spot kneeling on the kitchen floor, “leave me hanging like that?”

“If your well hung ass doesn’t fuck me, then yes, yes I will.” Red retorted, jumping off the counter. Today he was wearing sheer black stockings, which were attached to a red garter belt, with a black satin thong underneath. Stretch had skipped the hassle of removing it and just shoved it to the side. It slid back into place as Red moved, instantly growing wet.

“Well, when you put it like that,” Stretch said, slapping Red on the coccyx. The smaller skeleton jumped, and Stretch took the distraction to pull Red up against him, aching bulge rubbing against that same bone. He ground it into Red for good measure.

“Guess I have no choice.”

Stretch walked them forward carefully while he stroked over Red’s rib cage. Red moaned softly, taking shaking steps, until they reached the table. Stretch moved his hands, one pressing Red down towards the table top, while the other moved the damn thong again. Red laid his torso down without a fuss, spreading his legs once he was flush with the table.

“Guess not,” he turned his skull and smirked up at Stretch. The sight was too much, and Stretch fumbled to unzip his pants, pulling his cock free. He leaned over Red, pressing their teeth together as he thrust into the smaller skeleton. Red groaned, his pelvis jerking backwards and burying Stretch deeper. He nuzzled Red, preparing to fuck him as hard as he could manage, when the kitchen door opened.

Stretch turned to look, still hilted in Red. Edge stood in the door, expression horrified. He took a moment to look over the scene- and what a scene they made- before his face began to morph into a furious scowl.

“WHY YOU-” He started, stepping forward. There was a gasp from the monster under him, but Stretch ignored Red. He was about to pull out and face the other skeleton, but Edge stopped himself after only one of his long strides. He grit his teeth, looking even more furious for a moment, before he groaned, wiping a hand over his face. A glare was leveled at Stretch, and then Edge was stalking back out of the house.

“YOU BETTER CLEAN THAT TABLE; WE EAT THERE.” He snarled, slamming the door. For a moment they both just listened to his boots clacking down the walkway.

“Huh, it worked,” Stretch said, turning back to press himself against Red in some semblance of a hug. Red squirmed under him, his pelvis rocking slightly.

“Great, and I’ll be glad to talk about it later,” he said, looking up at Stretch hungrily, “But getting caught was kinda hot, so if you wouldn’t mind.”

“Are you serious?” Stretch laughed, lazily sliding his pelvis back, and then snapping it forward. Red moaned loud enough that Edge could probably still hear it. Red was something else, wasn’t he? Stretch pressed a kiss to the back of his scapula. “As you wish.”

**Author's Note:**

> My [tumblr](http://idontevenknowwhattoputhereugh.tumblr.com/) is where I: take requests, post streams, chit chat, do teasers, try out new fics, reblog a lot of skeleton porn, pimp all my favorite fics


End file.
